Toyota Prius C is The Best Car In The World

Gaze Upon The Glory

There are many kinds of cars out there, but today I have realised, that when it comes to the question "What is the best car in the world?" there can be only one. It is not something silly and pointless like a Subaru BRZ or a Bugatti Veyron or a Pagani Huateveritis. Those are environmentally-damaging distractions. No, the correct answer is the Toyota Prius, which we all know is the car which is single-handedly saving the world from pullution with its amazing Hybrid Synergy Drive, and in these modern times, the only car you should buy is a smaller one, which is where this compact Prius C comes in.

Let's start with the most important thing - fuel efficiency. The Toyota Prius C does 64 mpg when you're in a city and 55mpg on motorways, which is incredibly impressive. Plus, because it's a hybrid, it doesn't emit any harmful gases at all, which - assuming everyone buys a brand new one to replace their crummy old car, whatever it might be - means that together with the full-sized Prius, this car can help to reverse Global Warming. This is achievable with a 1.5-litre engine connected to a nickel battery pack and 60hp electric motor, making it electric, and a CVT transmission just like a big Prius, which means you don't have to worry about the tedious and wearisome affair of changing gears, because it doesn't have any. It just hums quietly while you get on with texting people via bluetooth and flicking through your favourite radio channels to find one that doesn't have those silly "trendy bands" that have infected the airwaves.

Something else that helps the fuel economy is shedding weight. Frankly, because this is a Prius, I'm surprised it isn't as light as physically possible to help save the environment faster, but at 1134kg it is lighter than a Mazda MX-5, which means it's more fun and has more "handling" than the definitive fun car. It also has a combined output of 99 horsepower (which is surely enough for anyone driving in the real world) and a serious 207 lb/ft of "torque", which apparently means you can overtake cyclists very easily and should have no trouble reaching 70mph, which is the fastest you can go in Britain. This car is actually based on the Toyota Yaris, but you have to ask, when this one is so much more efficient and has the prestigious Prius moniker, why on Earth would you buy the Yaris instead? This car even has nine airbags!

As far as I can tell, the only drawbacks are the slightly higher drag coefficient (0.28 compared to the big Prius's 0.25, thanks to that taller rear end), meaning it'll use a little bit more fuel than it could've done, and the fact that it's smaller, which will impact on interior space a bit for families. Other than that, it looks 'funky' and 'cool' with that Japanese styling (I particularly like the tail lights, which are very well-proportioned) and it has all the creature comforts you could ever desire, making driving a doddle. In America it only costs $19,000, and should cost about the same number if it comes to the UK, which if the always-trustworthy Toyota honestly cares about the environment, it most certainly will. I know I would buy it and trade in my car, which is now 5 years old. That's too old given how much more efficient cars are now.

Do the right thing for the environment. Buy the new small Prius.

...Just Kidding!

Happy April Fool's Day everyone! If you buy one of these, you're a gullible brainwashed hipster. That is all.